1. Why am I so exhausted that I can barely move at 7:00 p.m. but, can’t get myself to fall asleep at 11:00 p.m?
2. Why is it that when I clean and declutter one room, the rest of the house looks like a war zone?
3. At what age do boys learn to flush the potty?
4. How is it that my kiddos can go to bed at midnight on a holiday and still wake up at the crack of Neverland the next morning.
5. What moronic idiot decided that it would be a good idea to build a wonderland candy display at every checkout stand in North America?
6. Why is it that the cutest shoes in the store are NEVER available in my size?
7. Why is it that boys and bleach have a type of magnetic attraction to each other?
8. Is the word “no” really that hard to understand?
9. Is it just me or has putting yourself on the “Do Not Call” registry turned out to be the “Please call me at any moment that you would like” registry.
10. Why is it that whenever I see someone wearing something utterly fantastic and compliment them on it, they almost always reply that they had bought it in a foreign country or a decade previous?
11. Why can’t carrots, broccoli, and cabbage taste like a peppermint brownie sundae?
12. Why does everything taste better with butter, sour cream, cheese or salad dressing?
13. How come they haven’t come up with a cure for the terrible two’s yet?
14. Why is it that we cry on our child’s first day of kindergarten and yet we celebrate the day they go back from Christmas break?
15. Why is it that we agonize over giving our children middle names when really, we only use them when they are in trouble?
16. Why can we only have perfect hair days on the days that we never leave the house?
17. Why is it that one day our children are raving amazing reviews about a new dish that we have made and the next week, they say it is the worst thing they have ever tasted?
18. Why do I bother putting clean clothes on my children when I know that they will be covered in something within 10 minutes?
19. Why are my children so eager to obey any other adult in the world…except me!
20. Is it sad that I look forward going to the dentist because I can have a couple of uninterrupted me time to read a book?
Please…. add to my list!