Here is something that I don’t normally announce to the entire world. Probably because it is one of my greatest insecurities. I don’t know what line I was standing in while they were passing out helpings of organization, but somehow I missed it completely. This is something that I truly struggle with.

I have all of the desire in the world to get my home all decluttered and organized. I buy the storage boxes, pick the space, form the idea of what I want in my head. But when it comes right down to it, I have a very hard time figuring out where to start, how to proceed and the best way in which to get the whole process done.

Another problem that I have with all of this is hanging on to everything. I have figured out that I do this for two reasons. I either hang on to things because they have some sort of sentimental value to me or because I can see potential for repurposing them. So, if it is the latter, the item goes into a box of “yet to be named” projects and there they stay.

I have been taking a very serious, long look at myself and have been thinking up ways to help myself improve in this area (it is by far, one of my greatest weaknesses) and I am making some very intense steps in the right direction.

The other day, a dear sweet lady from my ward, and the mother of one of my friends, came to my house and spent nearly 5 hours helping me clean out my sewing and craft room. We went through everything. As we did, I was baffled by so many things.

First, when did I accumulate all of this stuff. I have over 20 large storage bins of fabric. Just fabric. All sorts of colors, textures and materials. I have more tools for crafting than I realized. I didn’t realize before that I actually have duplicates of some things. I have boxes of beads, buttons, glitter and patches. I have every sort of glue and every color of craft paint that you could imagine. And patterns and books… you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.

Second, I was amazed that with the help of a friend that I was able to go through so much of what I own and separate out what I really didn’t need anymore. There were so many patterns that I was holding on to that would no longer fit any of the kiddos that I have. I was at one time thinking that I would hang on to them for my grandkids but, I soon got a grip and realized that I needed to make room for the kids that I have now and not anticipate what may happen 20 years from now. I now have a very hefty pile of all sorts of stuff that will either be sold on KSL or dropped off at DI just as soon as I can.

Third, as I was looking through this stuff, I kept thinking about the money that I had spent on it over the years. I always buy my stuff on sale or on clearance but still. This has not exactly been a cheap hobby.

Fourth, although I did keep a great deal of what I have it was good to look at what I need versus what I want. I am actually really glad that I have a lot of it right now. I am starting up my sewing at full throttle to help supplement income and pay for some of the things that have recently become quite expensive (aka prescriptions etc) and I am really grateful that I have practically everything that I could possibly imagine in order to pull off what I am trying to do. That is actually a blessing in disguise.

However, going through this room over the past few days has brought up a slew of emotions for me. Not that I am attached to things, but suddenly I am completely overwhelmed with all that is going on. I look at how nice it is to everything exactly where it should be and I love it. It makes me feel so calm and at peace. Then I look at all that has to be done to the rest of the house and it discourages me. Not that my house is out of control or constantly disastrous, but there is still so much to go through.

Oh well, I have my start. I just have to do this one day at a time so that I am able to get it done with so that I can spend my time playing with my cute kiddos!